Mamdouh Alshammari
Writing Gold A
26 4 2010
Poverty
Poverty is one of the important problems that the world is suffering from right now. There are more than 1, 02 billion hungry people living in the world. They live in shelters and most of them live on the street. They have no job and no money they even die because of poverty. Poor people may get killed or may kill for living in this world. The causes of poverty are more than five or ten, but I will talk about two causes: overpopulation and rising standards of living and cost of living.
Currently the world's population is more than six billion, and more than a quarter is suffering from poverty. Whenever there is a rapid population growth, poverty grows with it. In fact, every day around the world, people are born and people die so it increases and decreases the population is related to population growth. China has the world's largest population, about 1,307 billion. I think the problem is not about the population growth, the problem is about how to save the increasing of the population, because if the number of population growing the world will be an uncomfortable place.
Everyone, whose lives in this world must have a problem with the poverty whether if he was rich or poor. Everyone can change his life, but the problem is with the government and how does the government control the population and the standards of living and coast of living.
Rising standards of living and coast of living, and today's goods which rose more and more. In fact, that makes some people can’t live and that makes them more uncomfortable also. Some of people want to live a good life but they can’t because of this problem. You may be shock when you see people live in the street, but that’s happening now in this world and because of rising standars and cost of living.
In conclusion, those two causes of poverty I just talked about are the biggest ones. Poverty, in fact, is dangerous and is a big dilemma, every country in our world is suffering from it. I hope that this problem can be resolved, so people can live in a beautiful and a comfortable life.
COMMENTS:
ReplyDeleteGRAMMAR: YOU HAVE IMPROVED AND PROVIDED A CASE WELL. HOWEVER, YOU NEED TO WORK ON YOUR DEPENDENT AND INDEPENDENT CLAUSES. YOUR THESIS STATEMENTS CAN BE IMPROVED.
CONTENT AND ORGANIZATION: IT WOULD HAVE HELPED MAKE YOUR CASE CLEARER IF YOU HAVE USED OTHER READINGS TO SUPPORT YOUR ARGUMENT. MLA WORKS-CITED LIST IS ALSO MISSING BECAUSE I THINK SOME OF THE FACTS YOU HAVE PRESENTED ARE BASED FROM YOUR RESEARCH.